There's no distance to run....

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - OCD

2006-12-17T20:30:00.000+08:00

Im quite pleased with channel NewsAsia for showing the documentary of the Week - OCD.Now i know that i'm not the only person suffering from such illness.There are others out there who do but their intensity of the illness is much greater than mine.I guess i have suffered from this disease a long time ago but at that moment of time i don't really know what it is.I thought mine was the worst but i was proven otherwise. Seeing those featured in the show really moves me because they have reached the period of which OCD cannot be totally be eradicate. However as for me, Muhd Ariff Johari, has not reached that peak yet and hopefully it doesn't.All that i can do now is to hope for the best.Alhamdullillah, mine is slowly decreasing.Hopefully it'll be gone for good.Now i can categorise my OCD under the numerous checks thing because i do alot of checks for eg the main gate of my house, the water tap and etc. Just to make sure it's properly locked and tap is totally shut off to prevent any unnecessary leakage. I used to check the main door countless times just to make sure that when i left the house no one can break into the house.Yes it's kinda stupid to do so but i'm really fighting it back then. My friend even pull me away from the door so that i stopped the checking. He told me he suffered from it also but i doubt that his is the critical one. Im very lucky that i managed to find a solution. I'm not saying that OCD has completely grown out of me but it is slowly decreasing. To me it's a kind of improvement. I really feel sad for them as they're really fighting the invisible war. I was kinda disappointed towards my mum. Actually i wanted to hide it from her but nah i guess i have to tell her afterall. But her response was very demoralising. She even call them crazy. Yes, from the view of the public it seems crazy but how about those who is suffering from it. Right, i guess i just have to keep this illness to myslef and find ways to grow out of it. Hope i'll meet someone who's suffering from the same disease. "OCD is a topic that we can talk about, nothing to hide..." I gotta remember the $3k lesson involving me with a rented car. Yes it got into a fluke accident. But trying to think back on what caused it was my OCD. I remembered i check everything in the interior of the car to make sure it is workable even on the road. Thus, without realising i actually bumped into another vehicle. OCD was the culprit.

I just hope that those who suffered severely on OCD can grow out of it.Not totally but slowly. Again patience is the word. InsyaAllah..

Adieu!

I've decided to just retire.

2006-12-16T17:21:00.000+08:00

Well, i was looking thru my photos and came across the gallery of my hockey pics. Yes, those were the days where i really put in soo much effort and thus neglecting my studies.That was one of the mistakes that i'll never commit, ever, in my life again.Yeah i didn't get any recognition lah. Was once a secretary and the teacher told me whether i could move down to the post of a quartermaster.So i agreed without giving it much thought. Then i got to know another friend of mine and he got my former post. I was damn frustrated man.But the reason behind it was since he's one of the top student maybe he shud deserved my post.There i was relegated to quatermaster which i don't even noe what it is. Basket betul. Then my A level results came in.. and i flung it just because of cca. If i'd known earlier, i just commit myself to be a librarian sia.

Even the above din stop me from playing as if i had never learnt my lesson. Well, decided to play again for Police which i admit i played like a shit ass! I was made a laughing stock sia and i didn't get the signs also.They made fun of me, the way i played and stuff. After which i decided to play for Tornadoes coz many of my friends were there.Yeah it did turn out good. However along the way, i discovered that i was just a backup.I will fill in any role that's empty, left behind by a star player.My enthusiam was so high after the Team beat Police 2-1. I was playing in midfield supplying balls and running up and down like a mad dog. Wiping any sweat that gets to the eyes.Yes, it was an exciting experience. However, the next game i was pushed back to right back. What the hell! Just because the star player who has been absent for quite some time suddenly return to the team and got back his place.I admit again i played like a shit bloke! because i do not have any experience in playing that position. I was feeling down inside me man. I was really hoping to just walked out. Yes the team got beaten badly.It's my fault but who gives a shit out of it.After that, i stopped playing hockey. Full-stop." eh sia lah, coach tjc kater bagus sak, flair player..". "Arep ko lari dah tak cepat lagik..." Well, dude thats life. There's up and down.If i ever get to the uni i'll just join a club or something or just sit back relax and enjoy. Maybe i'll try a new sport which requires a one man game. Maybe.. just maybe...

I'm getting sick right now.. no replies from any of the companies which i sent out my resumes to.I guess i just have to resign coz they'll never get back to me. Ouh, i did call up Kinokuniya enquiring about any job vacancy. Some there," right now the one who manages the recruitment is not in the office right now, Ariff, i'll just put ur name on the waiting list and if there's any schedules of interviews will call u back.." Call me back? yeah.. i guess this one gonna be burnt also. Yeah, i thought with my A levels results i can get a job easily but nah. Hoping for my future results to be better.InsyaAllah.

I'm considering to not chat anymore.It's useless i guess.Just wasting my time in there. Well, i'll just go into hiding. That'll be much better. Maybe i'll start with this mon. So tmr, it'll be my last day in the MSN world.

Adieu!

Mark this day down dude - 3rd dec'2006

2006-12-14T00:00:00.000+08:00

Heylo again to all my frens, im glad u came to stay. - Barney the Purple Dino

Hahah. I did it man. I did it. 10km was a woohooo!Earlier before the that day, I've already thought of pulling back from the event. First and foremost,i knew i didn't train enough. I mean running about 3 clicks to train will do no good. At most,i will not finish the race and will end up walking. Secondly my mind was like, alamak give up sudah buat penat jer.Hahah. So yeah, finally the nite before the big day, i decided to give it a shot. Who knows i might come in first! Wohhoo. So okay, we reached there late and due to some admin stuff that needs to be settle we started the race even later.So yup.. when all the other runners have ran which we do not have idea where they already were, we started 9 mins after the official BanG! We went slow and steady and finally we came to a place where we finally meet the bulk of the group.haha.I told my friend to go on because I'm gonna run my own pace, my own race. He was hesistant at first but after much persuasion he finally did left me. I was then all alone running together with strangers. Haha.It was awesome dude. Its like you are running and you want to stop but ur legs keeps on moving. It just could not stop. I did fine for the 1st 8km, which is like 2 km more to go. So yup, i kept on running and running.How are u going to stop and walk when theres an old man..mind you much older that u are is jogging. I mean if he can do it why not me. That kept me going dude.However, the last 25m i nearly gave up. All this while i was coughing to clear my throat of all the adrenaline fluid and so i moved to one side and let it go. It was clearly water sia. Just fluid nothing else. Then i resumed back with my mission. Upon reaching the finishing line i had a glimpse to my right and the 3rd runner from kenyan is gonna finish his 42km. haha.. wow. awesome dude. So there i am, crossing the finishing line with a time of 1hr18mins12secs. Yeahoo.. that was the greatest achievement in my life. The feeling after that was exhilirating beb.Now i know the power of the mind and hopefully im gonna to use this tool of the mind for future obstacles InsyaAllah. "rep.. next yr kite lari 21km lah..." -yunos.

I sent out many resumes about 3 of them. But nothing came, not a single phonecall, a returned email and wateva shit! It's like damn irritating la. I feel that im making a fool of myself by sending out resumes with my particulars and all that crap. Such that i dont feel secure anymore. Damn.Paiseh sia. And all these people have been asking me what u doing now? have u gotten a job? what shit. I noe im jobless now, but i did try what.. come on lah. All these qns kept repeating itself. I did evade myself from ppl asking me "Do you get to the uni..?" and i said i havent applied yet.Ya Allah, forgive me for i have sin.So there u are.. mr pembohong aka penipu.Haha.. i didn't mean to lie to them but i can't la.I kept thinking of my future now. With my A level i cant get a simple customer service job.. how would i do then in the future? Been really thinking about my results."yes i answered that qn..eh tapi yg lagi satu mcm tak betul" yeah..it's constantly in my mind. what if i did badly sia. Nak gi private uni tak cukup wang.. nak kerja sambilan takda orang mahu. But nvm i shall be patient.Patience is the key to success.

Taufik beat Li Dan for Gold medal and Li Tao clinches the Asiad Gold in 36 yrs. Whoo.hoo.. Asian Games makes me glued to the tv.

Alright Adieu.

Standard Chart Run is TMR!! Red Alert!!

2006-12-02T15:45:00.000+08:00

Okays,tomorrow as Singaporeans know of will be the Standard Chartered Marathon Run.Believe it or not, im taking part in this event not the 42.2km marathon but instead it's the 10km run.Yeah.I've never run a 10 click before for my whole entire life and this will be my very first time and i'm really looking foward to it.I'm not gonna set a new best time or compete with the best however I'm trying to set a new benchmark in running-that's the 10km distance.All i want for tommorrow is to complete the distance.Doesn't matter if i stopped for a break but as long as i complete it, I'll be damn happy.Damn sure happy.I did train for it but i don't think is enough because every training session i only managed to cover about 4km.Hrmm..hopefully it turns out good tommorrow.It's back to basics this time..Mind over matter.

Recently, my friend's roomate committed suicide in the apartment.What she did was, she tied herself up in the closet.Ish. Its damn eerie sia.Just imagine to open up the closet one day found a body hanging helplessly and staring back at you.WoaH!She really has a lot to explain why she hang herself in the first place.I did some research on the suicidal rates in the world.It says that countries that doesn't practice religion teachings are bond to killing themselves.This is basically when they faced with a real life situation for eg. under great depression, poverty, gambling debts, gender roles and etc.Japan for example has one of the highest suicidal rates in the world and the girl whom i mentioned earlier was a Jap.So that really explains why.I tend to wonder that even though the self killing was abolished a long time ago, it is still being practice today in Japan itself.In the early age where Samurais rule Japan, once they faced with defeat they'll kill themselves by using their own sword and pierced it through their abdomens.It really hurts sia.But that's the only solution to run away from the problems that they faced.Okay thats the medieval age and now we step into the modern world- WW2.Japanese fighter pilots will tie the a cloth with the symbol of the Japanese flag around their arm to show that they're willing to die for the country.Back in WW2, these fighters also known as Kamikazes, they will crashed their planes right into the American warships and this really has an enormous impact of damage.Like they said,"..the sleeping Giant[USA] has been woken up..".And i thought all those suicide attempts had stopped in Japan but i was wrong.This shows how important a religion is to an individual.No religion means no faith.However even those who has religion esp Islam, still commits still practice suicide.Take for eg the September 11 attacks on the WTC.They were Muslims themselves.I really don't contradict myself as stated above that no religion means no faith.Basically these people have misintrepeted the context of Jihad differently. Jihad is a term used in Islam which means Islamic term, meaning to strive or struggle in the way of God, and is sometimes referred to as the sixth pillar of Islam.However the Sept 11 context clearly shows no enemy on both sides- The Americas and the Muslims.If they are killed by an enemy while struggling in the way of Allah, they will die in state of Shahid. Thus Allah has promised Heaven to those who had died in Shahid.But sadly these people has misinterpreted all these Islamic terms. Furthermore as we know of, the killing of innocent lives and also the killing of oneself[suicide] will only open the gates to Hell.Ever since that sept11 incident there are many suicide bombers emerging out of nowhere.All i hope for that they change for the better because there's still time to do so.China also practised killing of one live.This is esp so when they bear a female child.China perceived that only the male child can carry on the fathers,the grandfathers and etc legacy.Thus, they'll kill the female child as it really serves no purpose.All they want is to bear a male child.In addition to the suicidal rates in the world, only China and India has a highest female to male ratio as compared to the rest of the world.All these lies within the gender roles themselves.As a sum up, suicide is the solution to run away from the problems of this World but not the After World....

Tmr I'm gonna set new benchmark for myself.InsyaAllah.

There goes my valuable post. Anyway Helo!

2006-11-28T01:00:00.000+08:00

Yeah.Firsly welcome back to Blogspot.com, ure with Ariff on Trifolium Radio. Haha full of crap. Okay, i suddenly feel the urge to update my latest post on Modblog but sadly the whole webby has been sold off to this company called the GoDaddy.com.Crap sia.All the valuable post have all been deleted.But nvm.I guess i have to start from new.So yeah, fortunately i still remember my username and password to this blogspot. Nasib aku baik. haha.Well the last entry was back in 2004 sia the year of euro cup and of coz my well deserved A levels.I flopped and flung it.That shows how attentive i am at school.Was too engrossed in hockey and i neglected my studies.Hockey's not to be blame but instead im the one who should be blame for not dividing my time well.Its clearly a valuable lesson to be kept in mind for a long timeeee... Anyway, i retook my A levels this yr. Yr 2006. Its been really tough studying alone and no teacher to guide.Back in school i have the leisure of approaching any teacher for help but i didn't coz im soo ignorant thinking that A levels will be a breeze and it turn out to be a failure.Okay,for this year's A levels, i guess i have done better that the last time, managed to answer alot of phy qns which i wasn't able to the last time. I memorised all the definitions and it really pays off.But im really hoping for results to turn out good. I pray that will get a full cert as before while maintaining B grade for maths, a C for physics and D for econs. InsyaAllah, this time around im able to make it to the local Uni.Ive told myself that if i ever get to the uni, i'll study hard- harder than before because 2nd chances doesn't come that easily or do they? Its true that i can apply for private Uni eg. SIm but i dont have the keching keching to start off with.My mom wants to sponsor my expenses but again it'll be too hard on her.Bear in mind my sis is also taking her As.Just say that both our results permits us to enter private uni,the cost will be very much higher don't you think so? Well if that's the case i'll have to make a sacrifice and hafta look for a job. A full time that is.Hopefully both of us get a place in the Local Uni and then we can seek help from mendaki for the subsidizing of sch fees InsyaAllah.

Im currently in a confusing state as to whether should i apply for a part-time or a full-time job.Since i have a lot of damn free time now, i thought of a full-time job and well if i gain admission to the uni, i'll quit the job.But what if they don't allow me? haha, i've been thinking alot lately and that's the reason why i imagine things that are not suppose to happen.Or maybe i should just go ahead with part time, that will be much easier because if i get a place in Uni, i can still work on weekends to cover my expenses.I'll think about that.Next week gonna find a job la. Im so bored at home.My friend introduce me to a Puma shop@Heeren. Interesting. Should apply dude.

And yes the other day i went out with Zainal my buddy during ns life. Basically the whole day was filled up with old stories.It's like we remembering the past from the punishment, the laughter the sabotage and etc.It was really fun. hahaha..He's also in the same state as i am. Didn't do well in the As and retook his As on this yr too.Ns has been really fast la.I still remember the day when we got enlisted to the posting to Division and finally ORD.HAHAHAHA.I was looking foward to receiving my pink IC but when i saw it, the feeling was no more. It's like nothing.Pink IC? so what? hahaha.I guess the physics paper that i was going to sit on that same day has over taken the adrenaline rush that's caused by the collection of the IC itself.I thank God that during my 1yr 10mths stint in NS, everything has been going fine. Alhamdullilah.No mishaps or what-so-ever.Its just as good as saying, all flows fine.HAHAHA.

If i ever gain a place in NUS-Ntu-SMU, i will pay my NAZAR which is to do Korban for the Year 2007.InsyaAllah.

Euro 2004 kicks off tomorrow...!

2004-06-11T21:14:00.000+08:00

Well well... the Euro'04 gonna kicks off tmr with 16 European teams competing to earn the title of the champions of Europe.But we're not gonna see teams like Turkey, Ukraine and many good nations participating this year..Let's see, Turkey was very much anticipated to go through to Lisbon,Portugal, but their hopes crashed after the underdogs of Latvia came 2nd in their group.Sad huh. No Rustu, Tayfun,H.Sas and others.Ok nvm.. but i suppose, its gonna be a very hot competition with BEckham leadin his England team, Zidane with his magic touches with France, the TOTAL FOOTBALL by the Dutch..and ehem! the previous World CUp runners-up..the Germans. And of coz..FIgo and the lads who gonna preserved the nation pride of Portugal.Its really an advantage playing under the support of the home supporters.Guess they gonna really really play real hard!The Portuguese gonna have an openin match with the Greece..i'll say 3-0 to the Portuguese.hehe..they have Deco, the brazillian born midfielder(MUST WATCH FOR THIS MAN!) the sizzling C.Ronaldo whom i'll say will have a lil bit of taste in that game coz hes quite young.Scaloni will surely have a player who's very exprience than him but i hope to see him in the startin 11 though.Not to mention Figo, Pauleta and many more...hahaz.go Portugal!But its not guranteed that i'll be watching all the matches...No Cable TV..haiz..Such a waste.Furthermore, my mid year exams gonna start right after this June Holis.Followed by Prelims and nvm..cant bear elaboratin more.Hah..it will only give me the pressure!Nvm bout that..Anyways, at this moment of time, i cant really guess which two teams gonna reach the finals..But im hopin to see Portugal through..hehe. Initially it was France that im supporting but i guess Portugal's better.Thank God the competition is held during this period of the year..hehe.so that I can stay up late to watch the matches..Ok guys..gotta go...Enjoy the Euro 2004 yah.! =D

2004-06-01T18:15:00.000+08:00

Nearly got myself chase out of the bus.

Had my first holiday remedial today.It was econs though.Felt very reluctant to attend the remedial but haha convinced myself that i'll learn something,So i decided to go.My tutor went through the yr 1s work which i've never been going through for months.Sat there and note down all the stuffs tht she went through.However, i was feelin a lil bit uncomfortable.Yups..amid the remedial, i was sneezing all the way.I was very sure that im gonna get a cold real soon but nvm about that.

On my way home...i realised that my EZ-link card needs some toppin up.But yeah, i was already on the bus with my fren and he got no coins to spare.So i went from one passenger to the other asking whether they got some change for 2 bucks however theres no one except for this old lady, around her mid-50s.She was sleepin though and i cant basically wake her up.But i got no other alternative..the driver was staring right through his small rear mirror.So i woke up this lady and haha thank God she has plenty of coins to spare.whahah..lucky me.

So lesson learnt today...bring some coins along in-case of emergency. Krekekekekekke.

2004-05-17T21:32:00.000+08:00

Finally..We Won!!!

Its indeed a wonderful and the sweetest ending to our hockey tournament.We played our hearts out although we are official out of the tournament.Hahz we won CJC today by a goal to nil.Why cant that be our very first match?Hrmm..maybe we're destined to win it on our very last match.The supporters were great, cheering and encouragin the players.Thanx u people.Now its back to school life..no more early dismissal from school and etc.Hahz.Im starting to get paranoid over my school work.People kept remindin me of the As..arghh so stressful.The other day,my friend was the prize winner for Institute Day after he came top in physics, chemistry and tamil language.Practically i was like ..fuuahhzz.Now,Im challenging myself not to chat over the MSN messenger over the next few months even if its over the holis.So it will be that way until my A Levels are over.Wow..that will be a whooping 6 months-I'll try.Gonna have losta free time after school since i no longer have any hockey trainings.Okays,i shall survive with the extra classes after school.

-If i fall along the way,pick me up and dust me off..and if i get too tired to make it,be my breath so i can walk...-

2004-05-13T21:54:00.000+08:00

Hey heys..IM BACK!!

Have not been blogging for quite some time. Been busy with trainings, tournaments and stuff. Yahs, ive wasted 5 mths by not doing any revision for my As.Im so pathetic. Anyways, my school has been officially knock-out from the A Division Hockey tournament. Had a match with TPJC today and we lost 2-0.Yah,kinda sad..but i agreed to what my coach told us after the match." No matter how hard we try or fight... we will never get there". Yah really felt that we are destined to be knock-out. Nonetheless, i've made alot of close friends within the team.The friendship within the team will not fritter away.Its kinda hard to start a frienship with someone but at the very end u know that we'll be going our separate ways.Gonna miss all the laughter that we had, the jokes we made, the pranks we did on each other and the never ending encouragement that we gave to each other.I love this team alot.Im glad to see the team( a mixture of yr 1s, 2s and 3s)communicatin to each other as if theres no age disparity.We dont practiced this policy of..hey! you're Yr 1 rite, den u hafta listen to the seniors.Theres absolutely no such things!It seems poignant when the juniors told us that they themselves gonna miss the seniors because theres no gurantee that they will have the same bunch of people like us next yr.I hope for the best for the juniors.We gonna have our last match against CJC this coming Monday..that will be the very last time im gonna play for the institute.Im so heartbroken that we are out after yrs of hard trainin..luck didn't go our way.The mid year exam gonna come real soon and by lookin at my common tests results i do feel that i got a lot to catch up.Anyways i just hope that the friendship we made will last for as long as im breathin...

MI...OI! MI..OI! MI..OI! Next stop..KEMBANGAN~ ( this cheer gonna be repeated over and over in my mind)

Switchfoot-Meant to Live

Fumbling his confidence
And wond’ring why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he’s bent for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we’ve been livin with our eyes half open
Maybe we’re bent and broken, broken

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

We want more than this world’s got to offer
We want more than this world’s got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live
We were meant to live

2004-04-16T11:38:00.000+08:00

A week full of scoldings..

GUess wart...din bring my pe shirt today and im so lucky that i din get any form of punishment from the Pe department. But i cant stand the way my fren was being scolded. Im not gonna mention his name yah. Okays. He din wear the proper MI shirt and also he was wearing the old Ji shorts. Well for me, i din wear my Mi shirt. So what did he got? A screamin from one of the teachers. Well the teacher just raised his voice, and said watever stuffs to him. Heads turn just to see him being scolded, embarassed, and felt ashamed in front of the whole crowd. I dont get the teacher. Come on...just bcoz he din wear the proper attire he's rewarded with that. Let me tell you peeps..that fren of mine wasnt suppose to get that sort of treatment. Well i got it once from the teacher before just bcoz i din wear the proper shorts. But its like so incredible.. -Haiz- okay maybe my fren answered rudely or something but i doubt that. Okay for my case.. i haven bought my pe shorts..i wore this blue Adidas shorts which is some sort of the same design as the current Pe shorts juz a thin white line at the sides of it. Well, that teacher spotted me and talk CRAP!!!!! Told me i should set example to the yr 1s.. think im somekind of role model for ppl to follow. Okay nvm. But why din he scold someone whos wearin an obvious grey basketball shorts. Need specs huh? hrmm beats me again. And another teacher was telling me to get a dozen of the new pe t-shirt..well dat will do if that teacher pays them. Think farnie issit? HAh...my hockey teacher told me why i din wear the shirt..so i explained to her. She told me that why i can remember bout hockey trg and not bout Pe..so i answered i got a passion for hockey. She grinned and wanted to hang me up the durian tree. HAh farnie lah she. At least theres someone who understands!

Anyhoo..this week din go as expected. Got losta scoldin here and dere. Yups. Well u may wonderin why my fren put up that ' i know what u did on 14 april' hah. HAhz..let me tell you peeps. oN that day i went to sch pretty late. Reached sch after my morning break.In a sense, i skipped 3 periods. Okays. din intent to skip my Gp lecture but i was too tired to even open my eyes in the morning. Hrmm..so i supposed if i was to attend it.. i might be slpin througout the lecture which shows no respect for the person speakin. So well i might as well stayed at home and sleep. That was when my home tutor asked.."...why are you late, your grandfather school issit?" i just smiled. Heex!

The pressure is already startin to mount...First match gonna come real,real SOON! Gonna make the best out of everything from now till this coming thurs. First match is always crucial. Not forgettin my common tests..Aiseh manz! Till then, chills~

2004-04-14T02:55:00.000+08:00

Im startin to sleep very late in the morning.Cant believe up still up rite now!!? Basically, i slept when i reached home from sch juz now.yah..so i guessed me had enuff of sleep in the afternoon. Yesterdae, during my lunch period, i was called by this PE teacher..my friend told me she wanted to see me. By the way, mind you..i aint that close to her u see..juz happens that she teaches me softball during my PE.I was totally shocked dude..like why she wanna see me? Then i din bother to delay any longer and just went straight to her at the canteen. Okae...she saw me sleepin during my phys class. I admit that..so yup. But wart im not happy was that she was showin me my slping posture in class which was so drastic and exaggeratin. I was like..wart the hell..okay nvm. Her lecture lasted for a around 5mis i think. So went back to my place i started to talk to my peers about it. The one sittin right beside me in class told me that i din slept the way she showed me just then. I was just pratically sittin in an upright posture while my head was facing downwards..hope u peeps can imagine. But before i left ..she did told me not to use training as an excuse! Hrmph..beats me dude..

GP class was fun yesterday. We were pratically laughing at the teacher's joke, ourselves and so forth. However...i slept AGAIN!!!!!! hrmm..but fortunately the teacher understands and din gave me another 5 mins lecture. HAh..i started to wake up feelin fresh and started laughin to my classmtes ' hilarious jokes. Then the teacher told the class that he was successful for that lesson that he finally made me smile and made me feelin awake.wokayz. He was tellin the class also that he wanted to tie a rope around my neck and hang it vertically right above me such that when i started to doze off..i'll feel the pain.haha farnie farnie... hrmm..i promised not to stay up late anymore.chills~

2004-04-09T23:42:00.000+08:00

Hey hey... I was late for trg todae. Arghh..!! Then we had to run 12and half rounds around the track. It was so tirin' that i went flat once i got home. Hah. Also my turf shoe surrendered itself todae after 2 yrs. It was torn at its side. Haiz..gonna get a new pair tmr after convincin my mom that i need a new pair for monday's trg. I felt soO heartbroken tht i even asked my fren to do the job of throwin it away..cant afford to throw it myself heez. But i managed to bring home its shoe laces..whu knows i might need it hah. Now i cant decide on what shoes to buy...hate decidin actualli. Well see how dude.. Hakz!

2004-04-08T21:18:00.000+08:00

CIp Trip: A visit to the Metta School.....

Hey hey...Im done with this blog thingie in the wee hours of this morning though i have sch in about 3hrs hahz. My couzin Eva, kept me company till 3am hahaz. Since today its CiP day, i juz thought why dont i stayed up and go online but i din expect to end up doing this blog till 3am?? Wanted to watch this deportivo and milan match at 245am but ended up sleepin heex! OKay..because of all that, ended up late for skool. Anywaes, my class has to go to this Metta Sch for our CIP trip. The innermost of me told me that this kids gonna make a mess out of me after listenin from their Principal. Okay. Then we were stucked in this boring conference room and were made to do some paper cuttin. Of all stuff, why that? All i wanted was to meet and interact with the kids but we were stucked they for TWO HOURS!!! Then it was time to meet the kids..i was like "wah finally dude!!" We sat in the canteen waiting for kids to whom we could talked with. Haha..came along this guy,Raihan. Hes 15 and cant stop smiling. YAh we chatted with him. Initially i felt akward talking to them since that was my first talkin to this people. I asked him bout skool, his family and stuffs ar..it all goes with the flow. Haha..a couple of minutes later, i started to be myself and lost all my sanity hahaz. Just went crazy thats all. Anywaes my intent was to make them laugh u see. ONe by one came to sit and talk with us..hahz. Got to know ridzuan, nurul ain and many more...the kids really made my day todae. But too bad, the time we had with them was short. How I'd wish if the interactive time was extended. Yeah im able to see that the world has no limited boundaries..the more people we meet the better we are actually. These kids aint bad afterall. They are just like you and me but the only thing is..they have an IQ far more less than normal kids do. I think im best doing such stuffs ar..talk to people and get to know a lot from them. Theres so many stuffs that i still ought to know in the world. Though im content with all the lil pleasures...i still see them as beautiful and meaninful as i wont get all the pleasures in the world. YOu kids have made my day! chills~
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here in this diary
i write you visions of my summer
it was the best i ever had
there were chorus's and sing alongs
and that is spoken feeling
and knowing that right now is all that matters
all the nights we stayed up talking listening to 80's songs
and quoting lots from all those movies that we love
it still brings a smile to my face

i guess when it comes down to it
being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up
these are the best days of our lives
the only thing that matters is just following your heart
and eventually you'll finally get it right

breaking into hotels swimming pools
and reaking havok on our world
hanging out at truck stops just to pass the time
the black tops singing made to sweet

lighting fireworks in parking lots
it'd luminate the blackest nights
cherry cokes under this moonlit summer sky
2015 river side its time to say goodbye

get on the bus
its time to go
being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up
these are the best days of our lives
the only thing that matters is just following your heart and eventually you'll finally get it right

get it right..

get it right..

being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up
these are the best days of our lifes
the only thing that matter is just following your heart
and eventually you'll finally get it right
being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up
these our the best days of our lifes
the only thing that matter is just following your heart
and eventually you'll finally get it right

2004-04-08T00:35:00.000+08:00

Hey hey what can i say...my very own blog. I aint sure if im gonna use this often but haha it will be nice to note down what has happened today. Kinda lame though but well you peepz gotta bear with it- hrmm...how many peeple will take their time to read this? well nvm. Anyways, the tourney is just around the corner and Im startin to feel the pressure already but the A Levels scares every inch of my mind, body and soul. FuuH!! Yeah, i've still got about 2 more weeks to prepare myself physically and mentally but i feel i lacked the mental strength. It's still haven't reach the required range. Feel so weak to make a last minute sprint...if only my mentally is strong and though fitness already surrender itself to its very end..i will never surrender man! But the Qn is how to strengthen the mental strength. Gonna face NJC for our first match. Hrmm... the way we lost to them by a goal to nil still lingers in my mind fillin every space thats empty. We gotta break the jinx! Till then.. gotta start taking every trgs seriously....chillz~